2021 Week 02

Packers 3 'Aints 38

WHAT THE FLYING CHEESE CURD HAPPENED???

38-3???

We all had high hopes for our opening game. Unfortunately, it was a horrible game! 

Thanks to Packer John for telling us about the Packer Club, Rum Runners in Las Vegas.  This is where we watched the game. There was a lot of talk about how Rodgers was not performing up to his normal potential. What could we expect when he didn’t attend practices and camps. 

Aaron passed for 133 yards and threw 2 interceptions. While Jamieson threw for 148 yards and 5 touchdowns. Secondary marketplace TickPick said the average price of the Lions contest before Sunday's game in Jacksonville was $231, and 24 hours later, after the Packers lost 38-3, it was $191, a 17% drop.

There are a lot of stats I could throw in here but honestly, I think we all want to just move on from this game. 

The good news is this is only one of the 17 regular season games. The team needs to shake it off, get their heads in the game and make this a great season. 

GO PACK GO! 
(Kerri Ellinger #289)

 Nik’s Negativity

 

Welcome to my new column…. Nik’s Negativity. Yes, you read that correctly. Don’t you get tired of reading how great we are and about how we are going to improve and win every game? Not here! I’ll give you the other side. You know, to curb your enthusiasm and keep you from being too disappointed. So sit back and realize that sometimes, just sometimes, we suck.

I was led to believe we needed to fire Mike Pettine and that would fix our defense. We went out and re-signed King (yes, that one) to start at corner and took a book out of the Al Davis playbook and drafted a CB in the first round because he was really really fast. Oh, yeah, we also picked up a 4^th round ILB that was cut by the mighty Falcons. Solid. Thanks Gute for those upgrades. This is our new DC’s 3^rd try at that job….and so far, meh. I’ve seen this movie already, and I know how it ends. We gave up long third down after long third down, 22 of them…throw in two 4^th down conversions, 5 TD passes and about a bazillion points. Yup. Sounds like every other Packer defense the last decade.

Game plan. Was it just me or was LaFleur channeling his inner McCarthy? We spent crazy money for a star RB and gave him the ball 5 times for 9 yards. This is not a typo….5 carries. We literally gained 3 first downs off penalties, and 2 from rushes. There was almost no pre-snap motion. Maybe throw in a screen pass to help out the two rookies starting on the OL, or use one of the 63 tight ends we seem to have on the roster to soften up the middle of the field. We looked like we didn’t even take a snap in a preseason game with our starting offense….um, wait a sec.

Finally….Rodgers. He looked like the aging qb that Gute watched for 2 years and decided to trade up to draft Love. Yeah, it was that bad. He took the offseason to grow his hair (copycat), host a talk show, surf and play a guitar in Hawaii with his new fiancé, and play golf on TV. Maybe a little football thrown in could have helped against the Saints. Maybe? Who am I kidding? This one was on Aaron. He just wasn’t ready to play.

There you go. Sunday sucked. Packers were hard to watch. I’m tired of having my week ruined because a bunch of millionaires didn’t do their jobs. We pay them. They owe us better effort. The Packerbackers were ready for the season to start, the Packers were not. I expect Monday night to see a better team. If not….you may not want to read the next article. At least the new punter looked good.

(Nik ~ One-Seventeen!)

 Just Sayin’

 OK, let’s get the GOOD from the game out of the way first. (Reader, take a deep breath and let it out.) That was it. Actually, the best part of that game was when the final second ticked off and we knew the Saints wouldn't score again.

Now that we have the good out of the way, let’s move on to the bad and the ugly, which were basically the same thing and lasted the entirety of the game. If you have lived around here for a while, you know that there is a city south of Greenville called Greenwood. The Greenwood High football team has uniforms that resemble the Packers’ uniforms. Maybe that is who was on the field playing the Saints. Because that team with the “G” on the side of their helmets playing the Saints had NO resemblance to a professional football team. That includes both offense AND defense. To say they were “horrible” would be offensive to the word “horrible”. At one point in the 4^th quarter, when the offense was coming back on the field, the camera zoomed in on AR12. A friend sitting at my table said “He looks like he would rather be hosting Jeopardy than being on that field.” Another way to look at it is if you believe in Karma, maybe Karma was taking a big bite out of his backside after the crap he pulled over the summer. Or maybe he was playing crappy on purpose to insure that the Packers trade him. Maybe he is hoping they will even trade him THIS season before the trade deadline (Nov. 3).

When Christy was taking the football around showing it to everyone, there was a comment from another table, “I wouldn’t take that football if they gave it to me. Murphy is a bum.” I understand where a comment like that comes from. When a team is under performing in the NFL, I think it is common to blame management. As much as we as fans like the sport of football and our Packers, it really is a business when it comes to Murphy and Gutekunst doing their jobs. Murphy and Gutekunst have the unenviable position of keeping a competitive roster every year, while trying to deal with the egos of agents and prima donna players. Like I said last week, Davante Adams is going to want in the neighborhood of $30 million per year in his new contract. Adams is in the last year of a $58M contract that had $30M guaranteed. He needs a raise. I wonder why he feels he needs to bring home a paycheck in excess of $576,000 every week to make ends meet. Let me provide at least 1 answer to that. EGO. As much as I despise Tom Brady as a player in the NFL, he doesn’t have an ego big enough that he demands to be the highest paid QB in the league. He will take less money so a team will have more money for better players to build a team. We have 2 players that want top money, with a 3^rd maybe joining their side (Alexander). With a cap of $208M next year, those players, just 3 of them, would account for almost half of next year’s cap. Then you throw in the next 5 players and they are $102M. So that is roughly $200M for 8 players. That is based on current contracts and projected contracts of #17 and #23. So, that leaves $8M for 45 players. With a minimum NFL salary of $610,000, the math simply won’t work. Yes, extensions and renegotiations help reduce a yearly cap hit. But that can’t be done forever. And eventually, top players are going to want that top money. So don’t bash the front office as being solely responsible for the team that takes the field. The big EGOs of these players is a major part of the whole thing. That is the kind of situation that Murphy and Gutekunst have to deal with during the offseason of most years.

I have not spoken with them to get their take on what I just typed out. But if you think about it, that scenario has to be close. You can’t pay everyone. And when a player prices himself out of a team’s budget, they have to let him walk (This is what happened with Corey Linsley last year). And many fans get pissed because they think the GM/CEO is a bum and let the player go without trying to keep him. So, maybe we have got the worst game of the season behind us now and we can settle back into Monday Night Football in the friendly confines of Lambeau Field… 

Just Sayin’

(Biker Jimmy)

 GPB IN OUR SPARE TIME

I was so excited to be joined by 88 of my very best Greenvile Packer Backer buddies at Spare Time this past Sunday afternoon.  I have always said we love our Pack through thick and thin—and it got pretty thin—but we have lots of games we can still win.  Thick will come, I feel sure.

We met some new friends and got some new members.  Help me welcome 617 Mary Palash, 618 Mike Palash, 619 Dylan and the Sharpe kids, 620 Tyler Boyd, 621 Alisha Vansistine, 622 Jeff Boss, 623 Aaron Hoyt and the McKinnie-Evans family: 624 John, 625 Jennifer, 626 John Jr. & 627 Jarell.  I look forward to getting to know you better as the season goes on.  Door prizes went home with several lucky members: 505 Heather Sharpe chose a great gold Packer golf shirt, and 455 Brenda Davenport chose a tee shirt.  189 Don Ranson and 423 Melody Cox each chose a hat.  117 Nik Papala won a badge reel and 207 Christy Papala, our party queen, got a party bead necklace. 

The club has started a new game this year (at least while the prizes last)!  At some random time during the game, a video game theme will play. The first person to reach me (Marge 328) and tell me they heard the theme will win a $10 game card compliments of Spare Time.  The first winner was 474 Jim Comensoli.  Cograts!

Now on to more good news!  Our club will be raffling off two genuine Packer footballs, signed by Mark Murphy, with a genuine certificate of authenticity and display case.  This comes to us courtesy of 220 Biker Jimmy who wrote a letter to Mark Murphy, who replied with two footballs as a fund raising tool.  Thanks Jimmy!  Raffle tickets will be sold during half time at each game.  The “powers that be” haven’t told me for how long, but club members tickets are $5 each or 5 for $20, and anyone else can purchase a ticket for $5 each.  Good luck!

And now on to the football pool.  When we have goodly numbers, we will have not only a $1 pool, but a $2 pool as well!  As an FYI, we have retired the 50₵ pool due to lack of interest.  Winners of the $2 pool were 221 Barb Gambrell, 262 Tom Zumbach, 458 Susan Sabin, and 113 Russ Larson.  $1 pool winners were 220 Biker Jimmy, 542 Kathie Mervyn 241 Tiffany Biley,and 263 Patricia Zumbach.  398 Bill Demuth correctly answered the season’s first trivia question.  He has received a $25 gift card from our good friends at Spare Time.  Congrats to you Bill. The trivia questions and rules for the game are printed in each newsletter.

The Packers face the Lyins on Monday night—not my favorite game night—but I will be at Spare Time to cheer my team on through thick and thin.  I hope you come and join me if only for the first half.  I know some of my club buddies have to go to work on Tuesday, but maybe you can join me for a while…Help me get the PACK back on track.  Remember through thick and thin…. 

(Marge 328)

 Packer’s      vs.      Lyins

Bury the dead…they stink up the joint”

Coughlin’s Law, Cocktail

The familiar songs, slogans, chants, and rabid enthusiasm. The best of our young men confidently marching off to the start of a long but hopeful and optimistic campaign. Their famed, time-honored and widely-feared uniforms set a magnificent foreground to the loyal and loving crowds of supporters clad in those same sacred colors…Packer Nation was ready! The opponent had no chance against the onslaught of these brave and celebrated heroes…Toasts were given, lies were told, but three things were certain: The flags would fly, the drinks would flow, and all roads led to Victory!

(FLASH FORWARD) No Man’s Land. Total devastation. All life and color devoid across the field. Smoke and stench hang in the air like a sick dank blanket. Foulness and putrid remnants strewn amongst what made up the remnants of Packer Army, which lay hiding in bombed-out trenches with the rats in the cesspool and mire. The survivors, traumatized, shell-shocked, and exhausted, were not the same eager and confident group that went off to battle. Grizzled, wounded, emaciated, demoralized, this motley crew could see no Hope and certainly no Glory…

The figurative yet poignant imagery of this, our analogy version of The Red Badge of Courage or All Quiet on the Western Front, are admittedly overly dramatic, yet unfor-tunately so obvious and apropos. Those of us in Packer Nation were primed, excited, optimistic. Couldn’t wait to send our fresh-faced and eager boys off to Jacksonville to get some glory! Let’s get the Party started! (FLASH FORWARD) News Flash: It all went wrong. ALL of it. All dressed up with no place to go. Historically terrible game for the Packers, and a major spoiler of our opening weekend as a new-look club. How bad was it? It was my first ever one-drink day (a double Crown) at a club game. I was Disturbed. Down With the Sickness. I had to seriously consider licking my dog’s ass when I got home to get the taste out of my mouth…

It was football, not boxing. Otherwise, we would’ve dropped a Duran against Sugar Ray and cried “No Mas!” And If we didn’t, Creed’s manager would’ve been screaming “Tho the DAMN TOWEL” in futility when Rocky hesitated and they helplessly watched Ivan Drago kill Apollo. Saints QB Jameis Winston looked like an MVP moving up and down the field. Insiders actually say he hasn’t played that well since he was bogarting crab legs from the Safeway in Tallahassee. Our offense was a Felony. The idea has come out about guys skipping preseason and lack of “focus.” The problem is, you tend to gain focus when you’re getting your ass kicked. Maybe a better word is “confusion.” The faces on the sideline looked more like Westerners trying to book a flight out of Kabul with Air Taliban…

Irony. Full disclosure: For maybe the first time EVER, I was a little late getting to the game. In hindsight, I wish I was like maybe even three hours later than that. None of us can ever get back that sliver of our lives. We can only hope to put the trauma behind us. For a moment, Spare Time was the morgue. Like supporters at campaign HQ watching your slow but certain demise as the results come in. Kudos to those who told me that Packer Machetes as door prizes was a bad idea…

Sidebar: It’s Good to Have Friends. Like many, I personally come to the club to watch the Packers and blast off, party, and socialize with some great people who are not only the greatest fans, but also by definition and default have a superior football intellect and understanding over fans of the other 31 teams. Admittedly, a few fans hanging on to the “Other 31” have made strides in recent years, but they need to understand the gap will NEVER close. Just dogs on the dirt chasing a mechanical rabbit they will never catch…

We’ve all been to Planet Overreaction, good and bad. We’ve been smacked up pretty badly, this was an all-timer, but no matter the degree of ugly, each game is only lost once. This disgrace should probably count as at least two losses, but let’s remain silent on that. There are 16 big ones to go. Turn those frowns upside down as we head into Chapter Two…

A “Preview” of the Detroit game (or any other) isn’t really feasible with our Editor’s new policy of articles being due the Tuesday prior to Game Day. So we don’t know much, but we know it’s Detroit. And each year that comes and goes reiterates that the Lions are on an ongoing 70-year long rebuild. They like to call it a “retool.” Like the rest of the division, they are also (0-1), but of course they are. They’re Detroit. They “retooled” this year by replacing QB Matthew Stafford, who had a career game for the Rams last week, with borderline bust Jared Goff. The Detroit media is giddy with hope after the Lions turned their blowout loss to Santa Clara into less of a blowout loss in a mad dash in garbage time. Does last week matter? After all, our “over-confident” defense just got lit up by a castoff. Maybe this week, overconfidence won’t be the problem…

I’ve been on many fields and in many locker rooms, and I can only hope many, many of these guys have been embarrassed and jacked up, and maybe even a few minor fights and scuffles have erupted for good measure. This team needs to find the energy, and I really don’t care what motivates it or where it comes from. It just needs to be there…

So have no fear, the Cavalry is coming for the Lions game. Just a week or so late. And they definitely “feel tardy.” If this is a “great” team, a term used much too loosely, we will find out. If it’s in the cards, Detroit is the tonic and they are in the way. If I am wrong and we are only as good as our last game, forget the dog. I will lick your cat’s ass, which is really saying something since I hate cats, am deathly allergic to them, and would probably die a horrible death upon impact…

Just to be safe, get some superstition. Whatever ritual etc you did last week, don’t do it again! FACT: I will always be back. All of us will. If that’s not you, quit reading my column because you are not worthy… Go, Pack, GO!!!

END ZONE: I’m introducing a new feature: The “Come on, Man! Seriously, Dude!” of the week. Speaking for itself, this will highlight and single out the lowlight/cowardly/inept/disgraceful/gutless-est for that week. It’s not just for men. It’s all “persons.” Example: Madam Bramlett, although in fairness not a particularly strong candidate but our only eligible female, was initially nominated due to her Un-Packer-Fan-Like and generally hostile posturing upon my delivery of the prize log. (Editors note: Delivery of said prize log was completed by Lewis Pringle at the start of the 2^nd Qtr. ~ Come on Man! Seriously Dude!).  It could even be someone we haven’t even seen yet. Example: “Nuvo,” a shadowy figure who was allegedly our “DJ” but was AWOL. He didn’t get past nomination because we’re still determining if he takes plays off ala “Moon” Moss or if he’s a shrewd operator who recognized the futility of this game and wisely conserved his resources for another day. The entire Packers team and staff were obviously nominated. Because of all the splitting of votes, the darkhorse winner is: The “Referee” aka Ass-Clown who threw the all-too-familiar phantom roughing flag on our lone bright spot interception. Absolutely terrible. Seems to happen to us way too often. Bright side: It didn’t cost us the game and make the NFL officially apologize like the last 12 or 13 times…

LOCKER ROOM: The Spare Time team of staff and servers were in midseason form. No rustiness or preseason neces-sary! Shelby, I’m sorry. My bad...

GAME BALL: El Presidente Neil aka “Clark” was a bright spot in a Sea of Darkness. He brought it big time in a lost cause and a tough room. Inspirational, infectious, moti-vating, Bunny-like, I look forward to following his lead through The Journey…

POST GAME: We generated almost $350 in an impromptu auction at the Packer Picnic. For those who played a part in handling the money that day: Unfortunately but obviously, none of you will ever make the All-Secure-Chain-of-Custody Team, but I guess all’s well that ends well…

PRESS CONFERENCE: Those of you who were at the Papala Party Palace for said picnic were at what many deemed the “best” so far. There have been many. Those that couldn’t make it: We missed you. Those that chose not to make it: You definitely missed us. Missed opportunities kill. Be better and make it next year…

(“Lewis” Pringle)

 

PACKER BACKER SHOUT OUTS

Welcome back my fellow Packer Backers! I apologize for the Shoutout delay. I'm still scrambling like a receiver that dropped a ball, looking to find a new house since mine went under contract so fast.

The Pack is Back so please help me wish Jonathon Smiley, Neil Petersen, Connor Parsons & Smilin' Al Pringle (Kraig's dad), all a Happy Belated Birthday! Cheers to a year full of touchdowns and wins! 

If you'd like to add your birthday or a wedding anniversary to our shoutouts please email me at 

heatherbailey80@gmail.com or fill out a members form (see front desk) for all your special dates and updates.

(Heather Bailey)